June 2013
my talents include
- sleeping
- eating
- hating myself
- saying the wrong thing
- listening to awesome music
I’d like to cancel my subscription to Menstrual Cycle Monthly
I’m sorry, it appears you’ve taken out a fifty-sixty year subscription. However, we can pause it for nine months as long as you sign a contract that says you’ll take out a subscription to Baby Daily for at least eighteen years
Damn those Terms and Conditions.
never trust anyone who can bite an ice cream without flinching that shit’s not natural
*does the anime character with glasses thing*
Does that really work though?
What…?
Really guys? Let’s see about that.
MOTHER OF GOD
Well I guess I might as well try it out too
not that it’s gonna
hOLY SHIT
what have I done
yo hold up lemme give this a shot
HOLY SHI T
DEAR LORD THIS IS AMAZING
I applaud people who get up and get dressed because I stay in my pajamas all day unless I’m going out
a dude at the gym just reached in his bag, pulled out a bottle of Hershey’s chocolate syrup, smiled & shook his head like that’s just something that happens to people, put it back and then pulled out a bottle of water instead
- Cutest thing ever: When people get really excited about something and end up rambling all about it. You can see how much passion they have for it and it's just the most adorable thing ever
If I don’t lose my virginity to this song I’ve done something wrong
imagine a dragon trying to blow up balloons but they keep setting on fire
it’s really sad
also imagine it trying to blow out the candles on its birthday cake
their birthdays must be awful
imagine dragons
I think the real question is why should a girl shave, preen and diet herself into oblivion for a guy in sweatpants and a t shirt who hasn’t trimmed his pubes in 3 years
Please stop reblogging this I’m scared a social justice warrior is gonna find it and realise I’m a boy
“Myself, a couple of guys, we talked about it in between [periods]. Somebody lays down and puts himself on the line like that, let’s not let it be all for naught, I guess,” Thornton said. “That’s huge. It’s not easy to block shots. People from the outside look in, maybe think that, oh, that’s what you’re supposed to do. But there’s that split-second before you see that guy tee it up and you know it’s going to hurt like hell and you still have to lay down in front of it. Not everyone has that in him. That was huge of him. Who knows if that would have been the shot that was the difference for that game.
“We’re very happy to have him on our team. I’ve been blessed to play with him for three years. He does stuff like that all the time. He throws himself out there and puts his body on the line, whether it’s fighting somebody or laying down in front of shots or finishing his checks. He’s a warrior for us.”
Added Thornton: “How about the courage on him to stand up and play on that leg. He wasn’t going to let anything —I think he tried to block another one. That takes a special kind of person. … It might look simple, but that’s not an easy thing to do. I’ve been there. Every hockey player at some point has flamingoed it at one point or another. It’s not easy to do that.”
” —Shawn Thornton on Soupy’s guts on that PK last night. (via this-is-no-cave)Even minor league hockey is more exciting.
so you say he can dance to anything
im laughing so hard why are people reblogging this again omg
help tumblr has reached singularity
i love this post
Welcome to the post that got me kicked out of the library
you’re welcome
I’m crying.
how diD I KNOW
- True Life: I have a hockey player fetish
are you there god? it’s a me mario
- what she says: i'm fine
- what she means: STANLLENELYYY CUCPCCUP PALALLALAYOFFS
iS tHaT a h[voice goes up several octaves]OcKeY pLaYeR
andiamburdenedwithgloriousfeels:
One way
Or another
I’m gonna meetcha
I’m gonna
ust
*tour guide voice*
if you look to your right you’ll see a relic from the event known simply as “Mishapocalpyse”
im cry
My mom still thinks that a Stanley cup final game is “just a game.” and that “it’s okay to miss it.”

















